SPEAKER_01 0:01

Welcome to the Ask for the Skinny podcast with a guest. I'm proud to present Alfina Lofaro. Alfina, welcome to our show. Please tell us more about yourself. What is your story?

SPEAKER_00 0:17

What is my story? My whole story. So thank you for having me, first of all. Um, as you said, I'm Alfina, I'm from Australia. I'm um speaking to you, it's probably opposite ends of the day right now. It's uh evening for me. And my story is that I've grown up here in Australia. I'm actually a child of Italian migrants. I from a very young age grew up believing that you become a teacher, you get a good job, a good life. And somewhere along the way, I think my the way my way of seeing the world was that there was more to that. And over time I've become um a coach, kinesiologist. I work specifically with people around their relationships because I believe that everything in life is about relationships, everything. So we have a relationship with our health, our money, our family, our friends, ourself, um the universe, God, whatever you believe. And when you get good at them, when you get good at relationships, you get a good life. So that's what I dedicate my life to now is helping people be better at that.

SPEAKER_01 1:23

Amazing. Uh, can we, before we jump into it, just uh uh discuss a bit about kinesiology? Uh kinesiology in your case is a bit different than what we know about in uh in uh let's say Europe or uh US. Can you please explain what what is the difference, how you see kinesiology? What is your uh let's say point of view uh so that our listeners could understand uh that you're not just uh physiotherapist.

SPEAKER_00 1:59

Okay, so kinesiology is a combination of uh traditional Chinese medicine, um, it's as if Chinese traditional Chinese medicine and chiropractic had a baby and then was born kinesiology. And what we do is we use um acupressure points and on meridians to shift energy and to restore the body to a state of homeostasis. So what we do specifically is balance what we call the triangle of health. On one side of the triangle is the structure of your body, so your muscles, your bones, all of the all of the organs, then there's the biochemical, so all of the systems within the body, the hormone, the endocrine system, circulatory system, all of them. And then the third part of the triangle is the mental and emotional. Now, when there is a stress, a trauma of stress, or any kind of injury that happens, one of those sides of the triangle will become um will become stressed. And so what we do is speak directly to the body using muscle testing to find out what the body needs in priority order in order to restore balance to the triangle of health. So the body can be in a state of homeostasis where it can heal itself. So if you come to me as a kinesiologist, we will look at what it is that you want. So, uh, do you want support with an injury, whether it's um relationship challenge, money stuff, any particular thing that you're working on? Um, we'll identify a goal, and then what we do is balance every cell in your body to vibrate at the frequency of what it is that you want to attract. And the body reveals to us. Yeah, can we talk about the body reveals to us what you need?

SPEAKER_01 3:53

Yeah, I would like to ask you. So um it's it's it's not just theory and uh woo-woo. Um, can we talk about uh the the physical part? Uh because you you talked about meridians, um, and can you uh just for the listeners that do not know how this works, um your description about marriage between Chinese medicine and the chiropractor is uh amazing. Thank you. It was the first time, and I I I heard that. But uh you have to basically touch the person to check what is going on in their meridians in a certain uh point. Is that correct?

SPEAKER_00 4:39

That's correct. That's correct. So um the meridians, there's 14 of them that flow through our body. We have yin ones and yang ones, and at any point in the body, we can actually shift the energy in that meridian. And those meridians are usually related to a system in the body or an organ in the body, so um, and they run along the entirety of the body. So at any point we can check what's going on in that organ and where there is stuck energy. And once you shift that stuck energy, then the being the the flow of the energy around the body shifts, and that can mean it can mean a million different things, but that energy means that you're starting to think differently, or um the the organs will function better, or uh you will actually feel less pain, even depending on where we test. And you're right, you can locate uh different points on the body and test them to see if they are a point that needs stimulating, or if if we need to um delve into the emotion that's stored there and figure out what's going on for that person, or we may even um uncover what's going on unconsciously for a person.

SPEAKER_01 5:56

Amazing. Can we just talk about um an example? For example, um I'm I'm I'm I'm not um an expert, but I'm a user. So uh for example, when I have an anger issue, uh it usually uh puts a bit pressure on my liver. Can we talk about uh how uh so so that we somehow establish connection between our mind and our body? Can can can you tell us like three cases uh which thing is gonna enact for example if if if if we are uh angry, then we can uh influence our heart or our liver. If can you give us a free example so that the listeners will will imagine?

SPEAKER_00 6:48

I can give you a few, so yeah, I can give you a few. So the interesting thing about the type of kinesiology I've studied is we deliberately learn the metaphysics of each part of the body. And so you're right, the liver is about anger, the lungs are about grief and sadness, and so the lungs fire at three o'clock in the morning. So if you have ever seen the traditional Chinese medicine, the Harare clock, that organ that's at that's firing at that particular time in the morning. So if you're waking up at three o'clock between three and five in the morning, it could be that there's unresolved grief and sadness. So you um some we parts the different parts of the body will also reveal different um different pains and weaknesses as well. So shoulders can be about carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. Um yeah, kidney, um, so we say that the um oh my gosh, you know when the word is right at the tip of your tongue, it's the spleen is all about um the sweetness of life. So if you if if the spleen shows up is as one of the meridians we need to balance, you're not getting enough of the sweetness of life out for yourself. You're you're actually so I call it you being the fun police in your own life. Or it could also be that you're having too much sweetness and not enough seriousness, but the body will tell us whether it's over energy or under energy and what we need to do to restore that balance.

SPEAKER_01 8:33

Um amazing. Uh the traditional medicine uh has a lot of shortcomings, uh, although I I I think that more and more research are proving that uh what you just explained is 100% correct, uh, because uh it's it's not just correlation, it's causation. Um and uh I I think that is uh amazing. Can we now uh jump into the uh you work with relationships? Can can can you explain like um the link between an organ and our problem with relationship? I will oversimplify it at least correctly. Um for example, if I have anger issues, I have a weak liver, um and I'm not able to engage in the more complex um relationships because I get angry so easily. Um is that something uh that you you can uh uh how's it um identify and then help me get out from that?

SPEAKER_00 9:46

Yes, yes, it is it's probably a reverse of that situation that happens. People tend to show up saying there's a problem, and then the body will reveal actually you're stirring a lot of anger that's come from this particular point in your life. Um, and here's what the body says you need to do to release that anger. And what I find, so I'll give you, I'll keep that conversation in mind. I've not seen that specific example, but I'll give you an exam, some examples of the types of things that I see. So people will come in with they see a particular pattern going on, so they may have had the same treatment from people over and over again. So, for example, um, one of the ones I see a lot of is um people getting involved with somebody in a romantic relationship who is emotionally unavailable. So let's use that as your example rather than you know, it could essentially be anger be one of the things that prevents them for being able to connect, but it's it's just one of the things that a particular person will show up. I just people keep I keep attracting these ones that don't care about me, they're emotionally unavailable. Every relationship I get into is the same, it ends the same. And so what they're starting to become aware of, though, at this point, once they see that pattern, is that maybe there's something about them that they keep being attracted to the same type of relationship or the same type of person, or recreating a dynamic that is unhealthy. And so then we will start to identify what it is, what is it that you do want? I want to have healthy relationships where there's reciprocity, where um I look after that person and they look after me, that we support each other emotionally, and so we'll set that goal, and then what the body is incredibly good at is revealing what this person needs in order to achieve that goal. And sometimes it can be dealing with anger that is repressed, or a childhood pattern, or a way of seeing the world. I had one particular client who had this exact story, and from a very young age, for some reason her father couldn't work, but her mum went off to do a degree, but left her a nine, I think she was an eight or nine-year-old child to do everything in the house for everyone. And she just never expected anything for herself. She just gave and gave and gave and gave. She's been uh been able to go out into the world and experience something different in her relationships.

SPEAKER_01 13:33

Amazing. Um, I will uh I have another elephant in the room that I want to uh address, and that is uh what most uh comments are about. Uh can we talk about a money problem? Where in the body our money problems are uh stored? I I know it's a general question, but uh that is something that the audience asks uh a lot in the comment.

SPEAKER_00 13:57

Um so I love this question.

SPEAKER_01 14:01

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 14:03

I love this question. And it um if there's a second book, this is this is the one I would use, I would combine the two and focus on the relationship with money. Um deep, deeply, deeply focus on the relationship with money. So uh back is where you the metaphysics um lead us to, is in the back. So lower back problems will because your your spine is all about supporting your frame and so um and your being, and so the lower back will be about financial support, usually to do with family. Um, middle and upper back are uh similar types of scenarios. So if you're experiencing any kind of pain or discomfort there, you can have a look at what's really going on around your finances there as well. That's where it does tend to be stored.

SPEAKER_01 14:58

Amazing. And and what is the solution to that? Where where should we start uh working? I I know it's too general because in general, but uh, do you have a client and that you can tell us a bit about how you solve uh his or hers problem?

SPEAKER_00 15:16

Oh this is where it becomes a little bit complicated because I've had many clients who have come to work with me around their relationship with money, and uh so I just have to go back in my mind. There's one really, really great one. Oh, maybe I'll share a story about myself. How's that? That's that's probably a really fantastic um way to go because then I can give detail uh without breaching confidentiality. So this one is actually more recently. So I am somebody who definitely is a go-getter and I'm out in the world and I have a I can have a lot of masculine energy. And one of my coaches recently said, now Alfina, have you ever considered um manifesting money from a feminine energy? And I go, What that what does that mean? You just work and you work hard, you go out and do things and you get money. What are you talking about? She goes, Well, feminine energy, the yin energy is all about receiving. And I'm like, okay, so what am I gonna do? Sit at home and say, Let me receive, let me receive. And so I I was like, okay, I'm gonna attack this from all of the angles that I know. So I had some kinesiology done around my beliefs around money, and um what that looked like was uh using the kinesiology specifically. I set a goal around what I wanted to either what you want to earn or how you want to feel when you're earning it as well. Not just what you want to earn, it's about like what that allows you to be, do, have. Um, so you have to the the goals have to be fairly clever. That's not just I'm earning this much on this day at this time. So I did some work around that. I also went, okay, I'm gonna allow, I'm gonna sit in that allowing. And within um within 24 hours, the phone rang. And it was um, I do um, I also am a leaderships, a leadership coach, and we work in high performance teams as well. And they had a program for me. Alfina, we're gonna send you to the north of Australia, you're gonna do this program. Um, and it was a $10,000 contract. I was like, whoa, I but I was just manifesting money yesterday, and I was like, okay, okay, great. Well, that was good. Next day, phone rings again, another contract, similar sort of money. I'm like, this receiving thing, how brilliant! How brilliant. Now, fast forward about two months, I had to deliver that work. And normally, where I work in that organization with a um a co-facilitator, we always work in pairs, all of the work that I got that week, I was by myself, and I had to work twice as hard. Um, and so what I was manifesting, then what I realized is I what I was manifesting was my um I was able to receive, yes, but I had two beliefs that were sitting underneath it that were I was also manifesting. The first one is I have to work hard, you can't just get given it. It's got to come from very hard work, and I have to do it myself. No one can help me. And I mean, that all comes from a childhood of working on a farm and taking always taking care of business myself. But I suddenly went, oh gee, well, so I got the money, I was able to manifest the money, I brought that in, but boy was that hard work. They were some of the toughest clients I'd worked with in a long time, and so more recently, um having realized that, I was like, okay, we're going to look at that belief now too. So I've worked with my um with my mentors now, uh, my kinesiology mentors, around allowing money to come from expected and unexpected places. That's now my goal, expected and unexpected places with ease, which has been really interesting. And just last week, the most incredible thing happened. I actually made a decision to stop working as many hours because when you're building a business and contracting, you just do what you can to make sure make sure all of this works. And I said, Well, for the rest of this year, I've worked. I have worked all of this year, day and night, on weekends. I'm gonna take it a little bit easier and trust, trust that the universe and everything that I've done will I will I can now receive. And I can tell you last just last week, my accounting company rang me to tell me that I was getting, I'd already gotten a tax return. Um, because I used the new system and they took out far more tax than they needed to. I'd already received a tax return, and just last week I'm getting a second return because I had paid so much tax. I'm getting a second return. And that's money I'd already worked for, yes, but this time around I didn't have to go out and put a lot of effort in and all of that stress around, oh, I've got to make it, and where is it gonna come from? Yeah, so it's starting to come from expected and unexpected places.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

Amazing. I would like to ask you one more thing. When people go and want to make a change, and now we now we know that um one way is uh to look at the kinesiology as a route to uh first identify the problem and then uh solve the problem. Where should they start? Should they read a book about it? Should they go on a seminar? Should they check videos like this one? Or should they get uh a coach? Uh what's your take on that?

SPEAKER_00 21:36

This is such a good question. The first thing I will say is no matter whether you do seek out a kidnet coach or a kinesiologist, kinesiology is a do-with, not a do-to framework. So that means that even though you come and we will balance you and all of those sorts of things, it's useless if you don't go and integrate it and take action. So you it it I didn't just sit around going, oh, the money will come to me. I actually had to shift my beliefs and create new ways of thinking. So um I'll say that. So should a person read a book, listen to a podcast, or see a coach? That is such a good question. I think the answer depends on how much time and energy you're willing to invest in this transformation and how much money you're willing to invest in the transformation. I think that um those of us in the industry that are really good at what we do and are really good at teaching, you can get a lot. You can get a lot out of a podcast, even just an idea or something I've said, you know, you're not heard that concept that your lower back is about financial support, particularly with family involved. Um, you if they've never heard that before, that could be the one thing that is a thread that they follow, then that creates transformation. But if you want to do the real work, you need to, I think, explore deeper. And um, books and podcasts will allow you to go there, but they may not be specific to your circumstances. So I always think working with a coach or a kinesiologist or a practitioner of some kind will help you go deeper than the books. But that doesn't mean the books or the podcasts aren't worthwhile, they are extremely important in exposing us to new ideas and new ways of thinking.

SPEAKER_01 23:47

Thank you. That's an amazing answer. Uh Alfina, before I let you go, I would like to ask you where can our listeners uh get in touch with uh your work and uh with you?

SPEAKER_00 24:02

So I've kept it really simple. Everything is under my name, so Alfinalefaro.com. On all the social media, I'm under AlfinaLafaro, so they can find me very easily if they've got the sh the show notes or my name.

SPEAKER_01 24:17

Okay. Alfina, thank you very much for all these insights. I learned a lot. I hope our listeners will like it. Uh thank you for being my guest tonight.

SPEAKER_00 24:29

Thank you very much. I've been I've really enjoyed being here.